Keeping your kids safe online

 Parents today are being tasked with figuring out how to set safe boundaries for their kids online while also giving them access to the technology that is going to be a vital part of their lives going forward. This is really uncharted teritorty for parents today, since most of us were able to complete high school before social media became popular. Luckily for us organizations like Our Kids have created some useful tips that we can utilize. 

Things that are important to teach your kids: 

1. Nothing is private on the internet: Even if the app or website says they protect your information. Even if you delete the post or picture. If you can opperate under the assumption that anything you enter online could be found you will be much safer. Also, have your child set their profile to private. Teaching them about how to filter who can see their information is going to be a necessary skill in their life. 

2. There are people online trying to trick kids into doing things that will get them in trouble or hurt them: If we are lucky we have created safe atmospheres for our kids to live in and most of them haven't yet realized the kind of evil that exists in the world. It is hard for them to comprehend that people wouldn't be truthful or that their intentions are bad. Kids are more trusting because of their lack of life experience. This is why it is so important for parents to monitor their kids activity online. 

3. It's OK to talk to you about anything that happens online: Facilitating an atmosphere where kids feel safe to tell you about things that happen, even if it is something they know you won't like, will increase the chances that you are able to help them in a dangerous situation. 

4. If you don't know someone in real life, don't let them follow you. In today's world kis focus alot on the number of followers they have because it represents a sort of superiority over other friends. It is important for kids to know however that accepting people as friends online gives them access to all their information. You wouldn't walk up to a stranger in real life and let them see pictures of you or tell them private information so in the same way it is not safe to do this online. 

5. Don't send pictures of your private parts to ANYONE. It may seem obvious to you as a parent that it is not a good idea for your child to share pictures of their privates online but you really have to say it to them! Again, children are more inclined to think that people have good intentions. If someone tells them they won't share the picture they instinctively believe them. Adolescents are by nature driven to look for acceptance. If they feel that by sending this kind of picture it will allow them to be accepted or find love or have a deeper connection with someone they are likely to do it. Talk with them BEFORE they send the picture instead of trying to repair a situation gone wrong. 

5. Revenge is a huge issue, especially for teens: It is very difficult for adolescents to imagine that the people they love and have in their lives today won't be there forever. So the boyfriend or girlfriend that they are fanticizing about spending the rest of their life with asking them for private pictures seems harmless. They can't imagine that fast forwards some number of days or months that that individual could use those pictures to hurt them. It is important for teens to never give someone the ability to have that power over them and we as parents have to prepare them for this reality. 

6. If you send someone a photo, they can find you in real life:  Many teens don't know that pictures can have location settings embeded in them and that people can use the GPS on their phones to find your location. This is why sending any kind of picture to someone you don't know could be very dangerous. If a preditor asked for their address they would know not to give it but they may think sending a picture is harmless. Letting them know how dangerous it is ahead of time is great way to keep them safe. 

The statistics are that 80-90% of kids have been approached for something online. The best that we can do as parents is to give our kids the tools to recognize dangerous situations and help them navigate anything that doesn't feel right. 

It is a strange new world out there that is forever changing. As your child's healthcare provider we are invested in their wellbeing just like you are. Please don't hesitate to reach out to us to discuss any concerns you have or to discuss this topic further. You can also find more information and resources at www.missingkids.com and www.ourkidscenter.com. 

Author

Sarah Elliott Pediatric Nurse Practitioner specializing in primary care. Practicing in Nashville, TN.