Parent Tips for Teen Mental Health

The past year has been especially hard for many of us.  We have been busy trying to keep ourselves together as parents and unbeknownst to us many of our teens have been suffering along side us. Teenagers do not always express their feelings in characteristic ways and many suffer in silence. They may not know that the feelings they are having are abnormal or that there are things we can do to help. Teens struggeling with anxiety or depression are not always obvious. They may be getting good grades, be respectful at home, and able to maintain friendships. Because these feelings are new to them they may not see the importnace of disclosing that they are dealing with them. Additionally, this past year has completely disrupted their routines and as parents many of us have attributed changes in their personality, sleep habits, or diet to the fact that their schedule has changed. For some this may be the case but for others these may be signs that they are struggeling with their feelings. So now that we are more aware what can we do to help? 

The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests: 

1. Check in with your teen frequently to see how they are feeling and how they are managing those feelings. Keep in mind that signs of mental health problems are not the same for everyone. You know your child best so as healthcare providers we value your opinion on how your child is doing and we take your concerns seriously. 

2. If you schedule your teen for a visit with their pediatrician allow them to have some private time to talk with their provider one on one. We love to hear parent feedback at the beginning of the appointment but just like we as adults can have a harder time telling our truths to those we love teens often feel the same way. It may be easier for them to disclose their private feelings to someone who is impartial. It is important for us to be able to ask them questions alone because they may be more hesitent to open up in front of a parent. 

3. It is important for parents to be mindful of the tone that their attitude is setting. You may be having a hard time as well and it can be difficult to hide those feelings from your family. Maybe instead of hiding your emotions share them with your teen. Let them know that it is ok to feel sad or angry during this time and some of the things your are doing to try and manage your emotions. Finish the conversation though with a positive message about how despite feeling sad right now you are hopeful for a brighter future. Being transparent with your feelings will create a safe space for teens to be honest about theirs and will also model for them some healthy ways to cope. 

Some signs to look out for: 

1. A change in mood that is not common for your child. Especially if the mood persists longer than you would expect. 

2. Taking a step back from relationships that you know are meaningful to your child. 

3. A lack of interest in previously enjoyed activities. 

4. A hard time falling or staying asleep, or sleeping all the time. 

5. Changes in weight or eating patterns. 

6. Problems with memory, thinking, or concentration. 

7. Changes in appearance such as a lack of hygiene practices or suddenly not caring about how they look. 

8. An increase in risky behaviors such as use of drugs or alcohol. 

9. Thoughts about death or suicide or talking about hurting themselves. 

Again, while these are warning signs to look for the absence of these behaviors doesn't mean that your child isn't having a hard time. The best way to know how your child feels is to ask them. We can't assume because they seem fine that they are. 

Not all children who talk about suicide or self harm will carry out those actions. However, any discussion of hurting themselves or others should be taken very seriously. If you are worried you should immediately remove any weapons from your home and make sure that medications are locked away where the child does not have access. The next step would be to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK or text the word TALK to 741741. 

This can be a very difficult subject to cover with your child but it is SO important. We as your healthcare providers are here to help. Our office is able to utilize surveys to assess for the potential of depression and anxiety. We are trained to have these difficult conversations with your children and we can make referrals to organizations that we know and trust to offer your child the best mental health services in our area. Please don't hesitate to reach out to us for help. If you have concerns call our office today. 

Author

Sarah Elliott Pediatric Nurse Practitioner specializing in primary care. Practicing in Nashville, TN.